Tuesday, October 13, 2009

Tao Lin

(Foto: Akasha Rabut)

Olen viimasel paaril nädalal kiivalt hoidnud silma peal noorel (1983. a. sündinud) kirjanikul nimega Tao Lin (Brooklyn, NY). Loen intervjuusid ja veebis leiduvad lühilugusid ning luuletusi.

Mäletan teda aastate tagant Amazoni "kui-sulle-meeldib-see-raamat,-proovi-ka-seda" lahtrist. Mäletan ta ilusat meeldejäävat raamatukaant ja pealkirja:

Tao_Lin_Eeeee_Eee_Eeee

o
1. Tööd

"Eeeee Eee Eeee" on Tao Lini esimene romaan ja see avaldati aastal 2007. Mulle meeldivad Tao Lini pealkirjad. Esitan tema senise bibliograafia:

(Wikipedia)

Tema tulevane romaan kannab pealkirja "Richard Yates". Praegused
intervjuud keskenduvad peaasjalikult hiljuti avaldatud lühiromaanile
"Shoplifting From American Apparel". Esialgu oli mul kohati 'ärritav'
tema intervjuusid lugeda, kuna ta tundus kurvakstegevalt
distantseeritud. Nüüd olen ta juba 'omaks võtnud', leidnud üles mingi
'soojuse' ja äratundmise.

(Kasutasin eelnenud lõigus jutumärke, et illustreerida Lini kirjutusviisi - ta paneb tihti sõnu, mõisteid jutumärkidesse. Erinevatel eesmärkidel. Enamjaolt on siiski distantseeritus mängus, aga sageli ka nt sõnade 'ebapiisavus', leppimine (?) nende viitelisusega, mingi second-hand keele kasutamine).

Tao Lini kirjutised (nii palju, kui neid võrgus olen jõudnud läbi lugeda)
tunduvad kuidagi 'puhtad', kuidagi 'vägivaldsed', kuidagi rahulikud (vahel oleks sõnad nagu rahustite all). Meenutavad David Firthi flash-multikaid, mälust kajab Bret Easton Ellise "Less Than Zero" (hinnangute puudumine ja seeläbi tekkiv tohutu vajadus nende järele). Läbimata jäetud/läbimatu kaugus vanemate ja laste vahel. Tunne, et 'kõik on läbi' ja 'kõik on võimalik'. Ja ongi ja see ei tähenda midagi, aga tähendab nii paljut. Toon välja mõned võimsamad kohad e-jutukogust "Today the Sky is Blue and White with Bright Blue Spots and a Small Pale Moon and I Will Destroy Our Relationship Today".

He picked me up and threw me in the ocean.

I didn’t scream. I thought it must be normal to be thrown off a cruise ship.

I was raised by dolphins.

Fifteen years later I found my brother in America. I punched him in the face and he went blind.

("Dolphins")

There was talk of teaching English in Taiwan. Young people were
leaving America to teach English in Asia. This is what the young people were doing these days. There was something in the air.

“Teach English in Taiwan,” said the air.

“Okay,” said Neil.

("Taipei, Taiwan")

Dana comes in the bedroom; I push the delete button.

“You just deleted a message so that I wouldn’t hear it,” she says. “That’s bad.”

[...]

I stare at a wall for a very long time without thinking anything, feeling anything, or blinking. Then I notice Dana standing in the doorway with a steak knife—blade tucked behind her wrist. She raises it, like to stab, and walks toward me; I side step, turn around; she stabs the knife into the wall behind me.

“I’m serious,” she says. “I will kill everyone. It doesn’t matter.”

("Go To the Beach")

I can’t sleep. I need to be on the roof. I’m moving my foot to the side frame of the window to try and leverage myself up. I’m almost there. I have two fingers touching a shingle of the roof. The shingles are like a dog’s tongue. I’m falling. I’m trying to use my hands to pull my head and neck and body up, but there’s only air. The top of my head hits the driveway. It makes a noise like an egg cracking.

("Driveway")

Dana comes in the bedroom; I push the delete button.

“You just deleted a message so that I wouldn’t hear it,” she says. “That’s bad.”

[...]

I stare at a wall for a very long time without thinking anything, feeling anything, or blinking. Then I notice Dana standing in the doorway with a steak knife—blade tucked behind her wrist. She raises it, like to stab, and walks toward me; I side step, turn around; she stabs the knife into the wall behind me.

“I’m serious,” she says. “I will kill everyone. It doesn’t matter.”

Ma ei kujuta ette, kas need kohad võivad sulle mingitpidi muljet avaldada, mõjuda. Igal juhul mõjuvad Tao Lini tekstid mulle üllatavalt. Neis on steriliseeritud atmosfäär, mis võtab minult - lugejalt - ootuse kuidagi üllatuda, pigem valmistun igavlema või lihtsalt vaikse kindlusega kurvastusse vajuma, nagu kivi vajub aeglaselt tumeda järve põhja poole, ikka nii üksi-üksinda, sügavamale - aga siis tuleb üllatus! Mingi toa uks ei lähe kinni ... ja see on kontekstis nii üllatav. Steriilsest faktide nimekirjast saab maagiline realism. Või tavaline koduvideo, mis muutub David Lynchi filmiks [pole parim võrdlus]. Tao Lin rääkis oma 'stiilist' re SFAA:

I would say it’s not at all self-exploration, but more like how, if a family goes on vacation, they’ll videotape it or take a lot of pictures. And when they do that it’s not really to figure out what’s happening in their vacation — it’s just so later on they can re-live the vacation. And that’s how I view Shoplifting From American Apparel. I’m not trying to write it down to gain some kind of insight, but, instead of laying down in bed and thinking back and remembering things, I can pick up the book and read it and experience a more intense version of remembering things. [...] I would agree that it would be boring, at least for me, to watch other people’s home videos. But my book also has another aspect where I crafted it and worked on it as if it was a work of art. So when I’m writing it, I don’t have a standard of just, like, a diary — my standard is of a novel. So it has aspects of both someone’s home video, and someone’s home video edited into a documentary.

(Stop Smiling Magazine)

"SFAA" on kuuldavasti eriti/äärmuseni (?) puhastatud proosa. Selleni välja, et tegelaste tundeid ega mõtteid ei kirjeldata, autori hinnang on 'välja jäetud' (kuivõrd/nii vähe, kui see üldse võimalik on). Ainult kondid. Lin "SFAA" kirjutamisest:

I think what influenced me most re what I included in the novella was that I wanted the novella to be calm and somewhat non-dramatic, so as to intensify the prose style’s effects. I edited out or edited down certain dramatic passages.

(The Rumpus)

Any time I use a word that I never use, or the sentences are so long that I have to change my pitch to make them comprehendible, or lines that I feel are really dramatic, or really violent lines where I talk about wanting to kill something. I wanted to avoid that in just one book, so if I met someone I could just tell them to read this book, and have the feeling that they’ll know who I really am.

(Stop Smiling Magazine)

o
2. Tao

As a person I can say that I don’t reject anything, or don’t want to reject anything. I would like to have the abililty to calmly acknowledge that all things are equally legitimate, from their own perspectives, or from certain perspectives. If my work rejects anything it rejects “feeling bad,” or it wants to in that it functions, in part, as a way for me to convince myself to not feel bad.

(The Rumpus)

My target audience is 12-17 year-old children who exhibit signs of social anxiety. I imagine them sleeping in class in middle school while maintaining a B average. I imagine them in high school thinking “Chuck Palahniuk is immature” while still enjoying his early works. I imagine them walking alone in gated communities listening to early Rilo Kiley.

My target audience is also 18-30 hipsters. I imagine them on the L train listening to some new NYC indie band on their iPod hating their life and feeling good and occasionally thinking “steady cash flow without a real job would be good” while knowing it would just make their despair more noticeable to themselves, due to having less distractions from it, but also more amusing for everyone—something they value in life.

(Bookslut)

Lin teeb sõbra Carlesiga bändi "Jesus Christ." (the indie band). Twitterdab (@tao_lin), blogib. Ta blogi aadress on http://heheheheheheheeheheheehehe.com/

Stop Smiling: Do you think about this at all, the Tao Lin Persona?

TL: I think about it constantly, but I don’t feel I have control over it. But I do try to control it, a lot. It’s just that, one day to the next day, I’ll think different things. And I’ll do stuff that makes the previous day’s work on my persona not seem like it makes sense. One day I’ll think that to help my persona I need to sell a bunch of stupid things on eBay, and then I’ll feel really good about that, like I’m headed in a direction where my persona will become more clear to everyone. But then the next week I’ll think that I’ve ruined my persona by exposing too much of myself. Then for a week I won’t do anything, and I’ll think, “This is good. I’m becoming more mysterious.” So I just don’t have a set plan overall. And that has become my plan, I think, in terms of my persona — to just do whatever I feel like, and through that to seem … not like a complex human being, but just a normal human being who’s not a character with set attributes.

(Stop Smiling Magazine)

i have been thinking about myself from the point of view of someone in 2100 idly thinking about my career and career arc and things like that while in a space station on mars looking at the earth, and i have images of myself staying in my room reading for a really long time and it seems good and acceptable

[...]

it's okay maybe now for me to be alone a lot, people won't feel bad or think i'm weird, since i've accomplished things and seem productive, people will assume i am staying away from society to focus on 'my things' in a passive non-asshole way, and my value as a human being will increase, perhaps one day culminating in a permanent feeling of being 'beautiful and meaningless'

is this the goal of my life, to trick people biographically and control the tone with which they think about me, feels like i am inside my biography trying to 'get the tone right'

(blogipostitus "can i write an iconic book of poetry", 2/13/2009)

Intervjuudest on seni mu lemmik olnud The Rumpuses ilmunud pikk intervjuu, mu lemmikkoht oli vist see:

Today I don’t think about “weightiness,” I think, except literally. 200 words about [anything] are viewed, ideally, as equal, to me, to 200 words about [anything else]. Today I feel unable, or maybe unwilling (due to it contradicting the way I want to view things, as I talked about elsewhere in this interview), to non-sarcastically process or earnestly comprehend articles that use the words “important,” “weighty,” etc. non-sarcastically.

[...]

I feel that for me to consider “weightiness” while writing, or to just think earnestly about “weightiness,” ever, wouldn’t make sense at all to me. It would seem weird, like I was in a science-fiction movie. It would be like if critics started writing about how novels need to have more toy poodles in them. And I read their articles and felt pressured and earnestly put a lot of toy poodles in my writing.

(The Rumpus)

Kergelt haakuv väljavõte novellist "Taipei, Taiwan":

He tried to use his ideas for stories and poems. But his brain would say, “Neil, what are you doing?” One time Neil was eating a peach and his brain said, “Neil, what are you doing?”

("Taipei, Taiwan")

o
3. Üks täismahus näide

dear ellen


tao is dead. you must move on. tao is dead.

but i just evolved the ability to scream in agony while maintaining a neutral facial expression and calm body posture. this is fun. maybe you should get a hobby. are you able to construct a mannequin-tao out of hotplates? maybe i can mail you some of tao's flesh and you can grow multiple tao clones. there are many possibilities. don't give up.


theo

("Hikikomori" #44)

Ei tea, mis mulje ma Tao Linist jätsin?

13 comments:

  1. o.o.o.o.o.o.o.o
    sõnad tunduvad hullult üleliigsed, aga esimesest reast tao linist alates tundsin füüsilist paralüseeritust, soovi teha zen teatrit ja mingit teksti-mõtte täiuslikkust.
    almost orgasmic.

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  2. damn, really comprehensive, it seems (i'm unable to read this language)

    good job

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  3. aaaa, no way, Tao Lin kommis sind! te olete nüüd nagu pällid või nii.

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  4. I believe this is the first time anyone introduces Tao Lin to Estonian readers so I hope this works.
    'twas a joy to compose. And I'm excited.

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  5. See kommentaar David Firth'i kohta tuletas meelde ühte eestikeelset raamatud veidra pealkirjaga "I ■ You" mis oli ülikõva ning nii mõneski mõttes umbes samasse lahtrisse...

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  6. Tõesti? Mul tuleb kohe selle raamatu kaas silme ette. Pole kunagi avanud. Äkki siis peaks.

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  7. Ma olen oma raamatu ära kaotanud, muidu kribaks lemmikud siia. Ruudu lubas oma kodus ringi vaadata, äkki on kuskil ripakil vms.

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  8. This comment has been removed by the author.

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  9. "estonia is awesome"

    Something tells me we have just made Estonia more awesome (than it was previously thought of)

    Kujutage nüüd ette, kui meil oleks kümme postitust kuus, mitte kolm. Estonia would be three times more awesome!

    Jimi kirjanduslik maitse on silmipimestavalt moodne ja väga huvitav.

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  10. Damn, very good, very good. There is only one thing that i don't like - he has stolen my headline - i wanted to put that "Hikikomori" as a headline for my book. And now I can't.

    Aaa. Ja Jim - lugesin just eile su "Portselansuitsu" läbi. Hea oli, hea. Väga piinlikult hilja peale jäin kyll selle läbi lugemisega - kaks aastat tagasi ju ilmunud, aga raamat jõudis alles eile minuni ja siis lugesin kohe ka läbi. :)

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